Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State
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We are legally required to warn that looking directly at Americans might make you puke. However, cosmetic procedures can significantly improve the vomit-inducing physical appearance of the U.S. populace. The Onion examines the most popular plastic surgery in every state.
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/owcjtdga7rihlx5noege.jpg)
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/uurpkcozcx8ndhmgd7xi.jpg)
Blubber injection
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/gytlex4xsigotrkyngdi.jpg)
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/ohrmgkdq7fouvbblbxom.jpg)
Getting hand replaced with gun
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/tgjhhuadwihgndxlstxo.jpg)
Grunting through bandages while pointing at menu board of procedures
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/vl0ceocasfsxm2xgplzi.jpg)
Fleece graft
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/za4esnyn8rcomgo5jj8s.jpg)
Vagina dentata veneers
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/omsopc9yif1lfmkz0y5z.jpg)
Conjoined business separation
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/tzenpkdb8r3u5a9oti3h.jpg)
Botched facelift to correct previous botched facelift
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/d8pcljmehsqswjjpinlk.jpg)
Lemon pepper face peel
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/qrowgxpdnqfw9ayi9hz9.jpg)
Coconut reduction
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/rf3rqurdjpzldphqzg1f.jpg)
Skin twice-baking
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/buvndvbeydtjqia8deik.jpg)
Fat sucked out of residents’ stomachs, arms, and backs and reinjected into J.B. Pritzker
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/yxnnj0s9rxbqgj3i9xya.jpg)
Eyes permanently rolled back in head to enhance religious experience
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/bzkz4c8foqjoh4o0nvkk.jpg)
Butter injection
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/anvgusvulwivtznuhrkb.jpg)
Surgery to conjoin twins
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/dyqvwaqdo9k7kknmoxvv.jpg)
Enlargement of stomping foot for more rhythmic fiddling
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/fyk4drrfxeg14kvohfpk.jpg)
Adipose boil
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/fco80i1j939wz9opfkcg.jpg)
Lobster detachment surgery
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/wrrk7ftz7ell7yrll0j8.jpg)
The senator will let you know what he likes
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/aoteuowcbtfkimxngqi4.jpg)
Forcing flat girlfriend to get double D’s
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/fdja6a5dwvedwijingvc.jpg)
Chemotherapy
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/yee7zorksrjesz927fys.jpg)
Adding second mouth for apologies
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/nzumskizwmi84f7x3qq3.jpg)
Racial affirmation surgery
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/gqw2sndihgqovtmyrmog.jpg)
Double brain removal
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/tp1qwsfhkjqxqxexn25h.jpg)
Sky enlargement
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/c7wcypko0gjjsy6dufpr.jpg)
Udder tuck
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/xxia3fs5ftlhs7e4vyiy.jpg)
Surgeon’s choice
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/aqbqtw1u9bwrymvrzcxy.jpg)
Swastika tattoo removal
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/koxzqpcbcrv63frori6s.jpg)
Chest hair transplant
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/ap9wdrbjg7bv9n6in4e5.jpg)
Nuclear peel
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/nr9neoenektzetxjbahy.jpg)
Brass ball implants
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/sox1h71ml60x358ntj53.jpg)
Tarheelization
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/cy6dmflwdgciftjctt4u.jpg)
Putting on big white T-shirt with bikini bod printed on it
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/bt6pwv0mmoeqpcovcfqd.jpg)
Abortion disguised as skin tag removal for legal reasons
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/bgend7rzzyi09qr46k5f.jpg)
Injecting spent fryer grease into forehead like Botox
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/hxh9nk9ozefb5casrotz.jpg)
End-of-life butt lift
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/ldn4kfrgnmgrkekobev1.jpg)
Good ol’ fashioned breast raising
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/kgt4kpl1u3ypyf4kexlp.jpg)
State enlargement
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/ttbdu8cvdhf3u3y167yd.jpg)
Stitched into human centipede as part of fraternity initiation
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/tvqgibaqe6eih0tokftt.jpg)
Drawing face on torso and making belly button talk
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/fwpqiqwmc9qvukjc2ceo.jpg)
Facial Aryanization surgery
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/mmgl4dxhd9gworhfikxl.jpg)
Silicone implants for hair enlargement
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/ftfsfjk8djjh2dsss8hu.jpg)
Stitching all sister wives together
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/escnhuipdv42shccgldz.jpg)
Wood chipper arm removal
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/nzjxd0hrv2jdysnwffnz.jpg)
Reptilian tail tuck
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/napeywstedmebtlu523q.jpg)
Transracial skin tinting
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/fbk3mldsaqnq4hsmit3e.jpg)
Lung whitening
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/gglzcs37tjdjaeu4mkhh.jpg)
Curd reconstruction
![Image for article titled Most Popular Plastic Surgery In Every State](https://i.kinja-img.com/image/upload/c_fit,q_60,w_645/sagfop5xxcxoopikzyms.jpg)
Draping horse mane over your head and pretending it’s your hair
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