New Yorkers Are Soaking Trump Tower With Balloons Filled With Urine

February 12, 2025 journo

Credit: .Martin. | via Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)

Protesters in New York City have been throwing water balloons filled with their urine at Trump Tower’s windows repeatedly throughout the day as they drive past, so janitors have stopped trying to wash it off and now the entire block smells like piss.
Several GOP Congressional staffers say Speaker of the House Mike Johnson is being “cucked” by Elon Musk’s hijacking of Congressional spending, and Johnson is betraying the legislative branch’s checks and balances on the executive branch.
Members of Congress from both parties are increasingly voicing concerns over why Elon Musk is filling government positions with so many twinks.
Donald Trump is reportedly irate after finding out his staffers have been telling reporters to “ask Elon” about what the administration is doing with all the job firings and budget cuts.
Trump just signed an executive order declaring that no one can tweet that he has a rancid body odor.
Dozens of high-profile magazines plan to begin putting Elon Musk on their covers weekly until Trump fires him.
Trump just signed an executive order declaring no one can ever call him “Von ShitzInPants” ever again.
The crew of twinks helping Elon Musk wreck the federal government has many pundits wondering if Musk was projecting all the times he has accused his enemies of being pedophiles.
Trump just signed an executive order declaring no one can call Elon Musk the real president.
So many New Yorkers have been throwing water balloons filled with their urine at Trump Tower while driving past it that public health officials say it has become a health hazard and they may have to condemn the building.
Republicans in Congress are debating a bill to fund a mandate for all government buildings to install a portrait of Trump no smaller than 6 feet by 4.5 feet.
Trump says he checked the Epstein Report, and his name isn’t in it, so there’s no reason for him to keep his campaign promise of releasing all the Epstein files.
Elon Musk’s 20-year-old assistants have programmed all government computers to flash the number 69 at 4:20pm.
GOP Congressional leaders are reportedly terrified of Trump’s idea to annex Canada because it would likely mean at least 30 House seats flipping to Democrats, and at least two Senate seats.
Protesters in DC are standing in front of the various government buildings Elon Musk’s young twinks have taken over, and are chanting, “Fire all South African DEI hires.”
A pen slipped out of Trump’s hand today as he was signing an executive order blaming Obama for the plane crashes on his watch because he ate fried chicken moments before.
Trump is reportedly irate after journalists kept asking him during his press conference today, “Did Elon Musk approve that yet?” after every policy idea he mentioned.
Elon Musk is reportedly furious everyone keeps referring to his D.O.G.E. assistants as “Elon’s Twinks.”
Trump claims he wasn’t booed at the Super Bowl, and that the crowd was booing DEI right before he walked out coincidentally.
Elon Musk is führious so many people are calling him “trans” for his transition into a Nazi.
A January 6th insurrectionist pardoned by Donald Trump accidentally burned down his house yesterday during the Super Bowl after he lit a pile of his teen daughter’s Taylor Swift t-shirts on fire. 🥃

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