The Fears That Keep Donald Trump Emotionally Crippled

March 15, 2025 journo

Official White House photo by Shealah Craighead | via Flickr.com Public Domain CC 1.0

Public humiliation of any kind to the point that he tried to violently end American democracy and publicly hang Mike Pence rather than admit he lost the election, and he lies constantly about any fact or metric with which Joe Biden and Barack Obama had more successful presidencies than him.
His hairline’s ongoing betrayal. His biggest regrets are the various hair implant procedures he desperately tried out back in the 80s before they were effective or cosmetically sound, which ruined his scalp.
Sharks, oceans, and water in general. He hasn’t entirely submerged himself into any body of water since the 1970s, particularly because, once he started balding, his elaborate hair combover and follicle implants started taking two hours and a full can of hairspray to mold into a shape roughly resembling normal hair.
Attorney General Pam Bondi releasing the unredacted Epstein files mistakenly thinking she’s going to help exonerate him.
The unveiled reality that he is not rich, and has been beholden to foreign oligarchs laundering blood money through Trump Tower and his other international properties all along. He is terrified the interpreter from his private meetings with Vladimir Putin as president will leak details of how he begged Putin for loans in exchange for selling out Ukraine and changing Republicans’ sentiments regarding loyalty and blood brother commitment to NATO and the European Union.
His father’s brutal, emotional abuse and psychological coldness. Several times throughout every hour of every day, his father’s voice rings inside his head shouting, “You’re a f*cking loser, Donald! Everyone knows you’re a fraud!”
One of his many wives or mistresses poisoning him. He has Barron try any drinks or foods Melania gives him as insurance against Melania spiking it with hemlock, arsenic, or some other deadly toxin.
Barron and Melania mocking him in Slovenian. Every time he enters the room, she points at his crotch and they laugh saying, “Goba v hlačah!” Melania has dozens of compromising photos of him naked, and has given several to Barron to keep in both his wallet and several security boxes in multiple banks to save as an insurance policy to stay in the will after the inevitable divorce.
His health records leaking out and revealing his extended battles with tertiary syphilis, illiteracy, micro-penis, mushroom penis, Klinefelter Syndrome, unusually small hands, “Sausage Fingers Syndrome,” and proof that all along he has been lying about his height, weight and BMI.
His children ruthlessly fighting over whatever he leaves behind because, despite tacky appearances of luxury, it won’t be much. He worries Ivanka will dismember Eric and Don Jr., and then mail the body parts to Barron and Tiffany as a warning not to f*ck with her. Ivanka was a big murderer of animals as a child, and choked out the cat his first wife got them when they were little. She then smeared the cat’s blood all over her body, and told Eric, “Someday, I will do this to you, too, only I’ll make you suffer much more than Sprinkles suffered!”
Having more business meltdowns like Trump Vodka, his Taj Mahal casino, and the Trump Shuttle airline. He does, however, think Trump Steaks would have sold better if they came with pre-packaged, freeze-dried ketchup on them like he wanted. He tells anyone who will listen that all his business failures were always because of other people, and often launches into long rants listing laundry lists of all the people whose fault his business failures are other than his own.
Donald Jr. ruining the Donald Trump name after he dies. He wishes he had instead named Ivanka “Donaldina” as his eponymous heir because she is not a total idiot, reject, and failure at everything she does like Don Jr. is. Ivanka also isn’t addicted to drugs like Don Jr. because she has fewer negative daddy issues on account of his incestual physical attraction to her since her teen years, which meant she got a lot of attention, praise, and emotional validation while growing up, unlike Don Jr., who was regularly yelled at and slapped in front of his friends.
All the future films and TV series that will undoubtedly mock his mannerisms, facial appearance, vanity, and gluttony of personality vices. He’s particularly worried about a Quentin Tarantino film featuring a historically revisionist ending a la Inglourious Basterds. He wishes there was some way to sue people and litigiously enforce nondisclosure agreements from the grave.
He doesn’t know how or why, but confident women make him feel small and weak. Maybe because in his college days his hot female classmates all made it a school-wide game to stand him up on dates, and kept a notebook cataloguing all these embarrassments, as well as the number of times he was caught trying to sneak into women’s bathrooms and locker rooms, but he can’t help hating strong, independent women. He has frequent, emasculating nightmares about Megyn Kelly, Angela Merkel, Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama, and Liz Cheney.
All the people he has forced or bribed into signing nondisclosure agreements spilling their secrets all at once because he can’t sue them all at the same time.
Elon Musk’s little son spilling out secrets about the corrupt things Trump and Elon Musk talk about in private with Vladimir Putin, Xi Jinping, and other foreign dictators.
Going down in history as America’s dumbest, worst president because he thought tariffs, trade wars, betraying Ukraine, antagonizing Mexico and Canada, pulling out of NATO, and dismantling the federal government were good ideas. 🥃

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