Megachurch Conducts Successful Nuclear Missile Test

LAKELAND, FL—In what the evangelical congregation hailed as a significant step forward for its security capabilities, local megachurch Lakeland Liberty Fellowship confirmed Tuesday it had conducted a successful test of a nuclear missile. “Today’s detonation of a 50-kiloton thermonuclear device should serve as a…Read more…>read more at © The Onion…

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Report: Perhaps Old Mrs. Howard Saw Something

NEW YORK—Surveying an alley in an attempt to piece together what had gone on here last night, investigators reportedly looked up at the window of an apartment building this morning and speculated that perhaps old Mrs. Howard had seen something. According to neighborhood sources, the 83-year-old shut-in, who has lived…Read more…>read…

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